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Have started using the "Posts" feature rather than just appending onto this.

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My pattern with xhamster has changed yet again. I remain attracted to women, but a doing a lot more watching only gay porn. The question I am asking myself real time is: "how much I am OK this remaining a fantasy, vs. how much I want to make that fantasy real."

Some fantasies are best explored. Some are best left as fantasies.

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My pattern with xhamster and masturbation has been changing recently. I still start with "what's the newest femdom" with an eye towards powerful controlling women, subservient men, and water sports. But I tend to be climaxing to gay porn. Stepping back and looking at that: that's hot. I don't think I'll ever be gay, too attracted to women, but I'm clearly attracted to topping and bottoming when I'm convinced a woman wants me to do that.

I wonder about the ability to do such a thing for a living. (Monetized video, not prostitution. I suppose prostitution would be hot too for exactly the same reasons as above.)

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All the below is true, but based on some xhamster chat messages, I am starting to have some dominant fantasies about interactions here on xhamster. If you are interested in an online exploration of a Dom/sub relationship with a person who has the type of fantasies written below, message me. Maybe this goes without saying: except for the servers at hamster, we will both stay anonymous and safe. Nothing identifying. Nothing monetary. Lots kinky.

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I seem to be a switch interested in both pushing men and women to the edge of their comfort, and being submissive. Current obsession is men drinking urine from dominant women, men pissing into lady's mouths. The two things I wish I could find more of; couples making men drink their piss (and his cum) together; and more sub men going ass to mouth.

Two things I know from experience that might be interesting to hear.

First, Guys, you can train yourself to love the taste of cum. Get silicon ice cub trays and for the first week, every time you climax, cum into the tray and freeze it. Once you have enough cubes, only ever masturbate with a cum cube in your mouth. Always try to get off into a tray to re-freeze. For me it took about a month. You will know you are done when you can jerk off into a glass or onto a surface and licking it up not only tastes good but starts you to get aroused again. (This is where I got to anyway.)

Second, when you are tongue fucking a kneeling woman's ass, you can put fingers in her pussy and use the fingers to drive the sphincter over your tongue. Not a thing to do all the time as it's got some health risks. I know I've found a hot partner when she lets me do this, and then lets me kiss her afterwards.